But God never speaks up; He gives answers indirectly and at a little slow pace.
Anyhow, being native of a relatively warmer weather, I could not bear the harsh weather in the streets of Europe. I started becoming ill. I had no good jackets to cover me from cold, or no warm boots to wear on foot. At last, I found a small cave one day near that junkyard, which was quite cozy and therefore, I decided spending the worst days of life over there.
At first, I thought there must be monsters, animals or insects inside; but snow and chilly weather pushed me to go inside.After all, getting bitten by insects was better than getting killed by severe cold.
I took God’s name and went inside. What I found over there was:
It’s just dark and cozy. Good to sleep here to rid from cold. I said to myself and decided to sleep.
Being very tired, I lay down and was just about to sleep when I heard horns squeaking, people shouting, vehicles bumping. There was a whole bulk of cars roaring and bumping into each other. Clamor, clamor everywhere
“In that weather, when there is constant rain everywhere. Who could do this foolish play?” it was totally not understandable and sudden.
Maybe there is a race going on or maybe there is a police fight.
What can I do and why will I do? I am already tired. I should sleep now. I argued with myself.
It was a big gun shot and another shot and another, and yet another.
Oh my God! What the hell? Let me go outside and check. There was more fighting outside than rain. People dressed in black, with fully covered faces, they had big, small, old, new….all types of weapons with them.
It was probably a gang. They were killing each other like mad animals. I was thinking they could not see me, but one of them did.
He saw me, means I was not alive anymore. RUN… I said to myself, leaving one or two things left with me including my documents and passport behind. I was out of senses.
I began running like a horse. I did not know the direction, I did not know I was ill and cold, I did not remember that I was hungry; I did not remember that my documents were behind. I was just running….
I was drenched, cold and sneezing and just about to fall down, or perhaps, I fell somewhere in the middle of a road, meeting up with a huge bridge.
Being an outsider, I was not very accustomed to such conditions: alone, broke, unemployed, sick, depressed, without my love, my Nighat, without my friend and so on. I had become a living amalgam of problems indeed.
I had spent all live living like a prince due to Nighat. She was a single parent, yet she provided me with every single thing I wished for and today, I was actually like nowhere! There was not anybody known to me in the entire country as well so to me, this was my end,
“Say as much prayers as you can, Sameer your leaving this planet today”